jesse bones!

Sat, 13 Jun 2009 10:49:18 GMT

I was in heaven
I was in hell
Believe in neither
But fear them as well
This ones a doctor
This ones a lawyer
This ones a cash fiend
Taking your money
Back of the metro
Ride on the greyhound
Drunk on the amtrak
Please shut up
Another rider
He was a talker
Talking about tv
Please shut up
This ones a crazer
Daydreaming disaster
The origin of junk food
Rutting through garbage
Tasty but worthless
Dogs eat their own shit
Were doing the cockroach yeah
Doin the cockroach yeah
Doin the cockroach yeah (alright, not bad) (x3)
One year
Twenty years
Forty years
Fifty years
Down the road in your life
Youll look in the mirror
And say, my parents are still alive.
You move your mouth
You shake your tongue
You vibrate my eardrums
Youre saying words
But you know I aint listening
Youre walking down the street
Your face
Your lips
Your hips
Your eyes
They meet
Youre not hungry though
Well late last winter
Down below the equator
They had a summer that would make you blister
Oh my mind is all made up
So Ill have to sleep in it (x3)

Thu, 28 May 2009 07:43:26 GMT

There was a girl named Annie, she had a very pretty face
And not the way you think so let me see if I can try to explain it
She had a smile that could light up the room and if she moved it'd be moving in you
But she wasn't like a magazine, she was just plain Jane and her name was Annie

She never looked in the mirror, she never liked what she would see
And even if I tried to tell her, she never listened to a word I'd say
She always wanted what she never had, but never had what she needed so badly
Someone telling her she was fine and that's not right and it's why I'm saying

Annie don't be shy here, Annie don't just lie there, looks don't make the world go round but it comes around
Annie don't be shy here, Annie please don't cry here, I always have to stop myself
Cause you're beautiful

I didn't know if I could tell her, I didn't know if I could make her see
She didn't need to find her beauty, she didn't need to find a way to show me
They took her moments of feeling alive and made them moments of dying inside
She needed someone to scream her name, to take her pain and it's why I'm screaming

Annie don't be shy here, Annie don't just lie there, looks don't make the world go round but it comes around
Annie don't be shy here, Annie please don't cry here, I always have to stop myself
Cause you're beautiful

And Annie you are the one sight my eyes never tire of, it's like I cannot get enough of you
Annie you are the one song left in my symphony, like you were made for me

Annie don't be shy here, Annie don't just lie there, looks don't make the world go round but it comes around
Annie don't be shy here, Annie please don't cry here, I always have to stop myself
Cause you're beautiful

Wed, 06 May 2009 04:50:41 GMT

I physically don't know how to sleep alone. I hate this.

Wed, 29 Apr 2009 04:25:12 GMT

In all honesty, I think anyone who bothers with me is only wasting their time.

Mon, 06 Apr 2009 07:27:43 GMT

I'm lookin' for a dime that's top of the line
Cute face slim waist with a big behind
I need a dime that's top of the line
Cute face slim waist with a big behind
You want this money then you gotta be a
Bad bitch
Shake that ass from the tip if you a
Bad bitch
Drop it down to the floor if you a
Bad bitch
O no she ain't no hoe, she just a
Bad bitch

I'm in the club, lookin' for a
Bad bitch
In the parkin' lot, lookin' for a
Bad bitch
Everywhere I go I'm trying to find a
Bad bitch
You know me I gotta keep me a
Bad bitch
I freak in the morning, freak in the evening
I'm looking for a freak when I'm done block bleedin
Now take me to her house, tease me, then please me
and tell all her friends dick made her sleepy, believe me, when I'm up in that im beattin it,
givin' ya that Mike Jones' threatment
I could tell by the way she walk that she got it
body so deadly, you can tell when she dropped it
I either gon' hit her on the beat ass out
I seen her walk by me, damn near passed out
Then crept up behind her, told her it was time ta,
Let a playa like me get in that vagina

I'm lookin' for a dime that's top of the line
Cute face slim waist with a big behind
I need a dime that's top of the line
Cute face slim waist with a big behind
You want this money so you gotta be a
Bad bitch
Shake that ass for the tip of you a
Bad bitch
Drop it down to the floor if you a
Bad bitch
O no she ain't no hoe, she just a
Bad bitch

She's a ghettoass bitch, with some ghettoass game,
in the clubs where she work n she poppin' that thing
said the bread keep her fed n the head at the bar
She could let her breath on a nigga dick make him come,
Come one! Come one! Come all! Come all!
where them hoes like to get buck and bone
If they can't take off they drowers'
Aint Standin there, nigga no
I know the way she dance, she look like she fuckin' herself
Shawty do a nuthin' just touching herself
Freaky ways she can shake ass for days
gettin kinky in sixty-nine different ways
Jump onstage she gettin pays going off
You got enough money she taking the clothes off
Look at that, I tought I taw a putty tat
I did I did I did
taw a putty tat

I'm lookin' for a dime that's top of the line
Cute face slim waist with a big behind
I need a dime that's top of the line
Cute face slim waist with a big behind
You want his money so you gotta be a
Bad bitch
Shake that ass for the tip of you a
Bad bitch
Drop it down to the floor if you a
Bad bitch
O no she ain't no hoe, she just a
Bad bitch

Bitch move, like you got something to prove
Keep running you dick sucka hoe you going to lose
I don't wanna hear 'bout your motherfucking blues
i'd rather see ya ass clap clap in them shoes
Right
Damn Damn Damn Damn
Wham Wham
I tought I taw a puttytat

shawty gettin' crunk love gettin' low
Everywhere she take it to the flo'
Make a booty roll take her clothes off
With teeth, little smokin weed
As she getting hella freaky on that ecstacy
Or dance for me song after song
shawty won't stop she goes all night long
and thas a girl who know what she want and like
she a schoolgirl by day and a stripper by night

I'm lookin' for a dime that's top of the line
Cute face slim waist with a big behind
I need a dime that's top of the line
Cute face slim waist with a big behind
You want his money so you gotta be a
Bad bitch
Shake that ass for the tip of you a
Bad bitch
Drop it down to the floor if you a
Bad bitch
O no she ain't no hoe, she just a
Bad bitch

Mon, 06 Apr 2009 00:04:42 GMT

I am heaven sent
Don't you dare forget
I am all you've ever wanted
What all the other boys all promised
Sorry I told
I just needed you to know
I think in decimals and dollars
I am the cause to all your problems
Shelter from cold
We are never alone
Coordinate brain and mouth
Then ask me what it's like to have myself so figured out
I wish I knew
I hope this song starts a craze.
The kind of song that ignites the airwaves
The kind of song that makes people glad to be where they are
with whoever they're there with
This is war
Every line is about who I don't wanna write about anymore.
I hope you come down with something
they can't diagnose, don't have the cure for
Holding on to your grudge
Oh it's so hard to have someone to love
And keeping quiet is hard
Cause you can't keep a secret
if it never was a secret to start
(at least pretend you didn't want to get caught)
We're consentrated on falling apart
We were contenders, now throwing the fights
I just want to believe...I just want to believe..I just want to believe.. in us
Oh, we're so controversial
We are [I am] entirely smooth
We admit to the truth
We are [I am] the best at what we do
And these are the words you wish you wrote down
This is the way you wish your voice sounds Handsome and smart
Ooh, my tongue's the only muscle on my body
that works harder than my heart
And it's all from watching t.v.
And from speeding up my breathing
Would'nt stop if I could
Oh, it hurts to be this good
You're holding on to your grudge
Oh, it hurts to always have to be honest with the one that you love
Oh, so let it go
This is the grace only we can bestow
This is the price you pay for loss of control
This is the break in the bend
This is the closest of calls
This is the reason you're alone
This is the rise and fall

Fri, 03 Apr 2009 23:22:09 GMT

i fall into the same traps, every time.

single.
alone.
lonely.
quite miserable.
unsatisfied.

leaving for virginia in 2 weeks.

Tue, 27 Jan 2009 20:59:47 GMT

i'm not dead.

i'm still not too stoked on life.

i'm living with a boyfriend, in the middle of no where.

still losing all that i was close with before.

not on good terms with, majority of anyone.

i need to move out of state, permanently.

new york, is not my jam.

ugh :[

Mon, 10 Mar 2008 23:58:34 GMT

So i had to go to the doctor's today.
It didn't go well.
They found another infection.
So they practically did surgery on me right there.
I was literally all tears.
They threw me on new medication.
I have to go back Thursday to actually get work done.
As well as I have to go and get ahold of my main doctor and get looked at
I may have come down with some virus and I can't even speak
And then next thursday I get a re evaluation and see how the medicine is working.
Then like 3 days from that I leave for Pittsburgh.
So we'll have to hope that everything works and I get better or else I'm honestly fucked.

/crosses fingers.

2 MORE WEEKS!

Mon, 10 Mar 2008 17:24:51 GMT

I'm moving to Pittsburgh in just 2 weeks!
I'm so excited.
I've been counting down the days and finally.
Just 2 weeks left.
I'm beyond happy.

I'm at my mom's right now,
I've been hoping around place to place to just have a roof over my head.
But I'm staying at my moms for a bit.
I have to go back up to Oswego soon and move out more stuff from Dan's house.

It's been really hard on me though.
Dan and me breaking up and fighting every waking moment.
A certain guy getting in the middle of it and just making everything worse.
I've been even staying with Dan a lot.
That didn't help at all.

I guess I just kinda learned a huge lesson.
Don't move in with a significant other when they still live with their parents.
Lawl

That was actually a joke, but pretty true.
Because sharing a signal room with Dan, his brother Jeff, and Brandon.
Was a little much for me to handle.

But I'm moving in 2 weeks.
I'm moving in with JT, DM, Danny, and Sarah.
I can't wait.

I'm still on the job hunt and I'm not having tons of luck.
But i'm going to keep trying the best I can.

woo

Mon, 15 Oct 2007 19:45:56 GMT

I have to fill out my forms to get my health insurance and dental insurance started. I'm stoked on having free eye care though.

I put an offer on a few places already. I'm going to have to find out some more information about showing proof that dan is a significant other to be put on my insurance.

I'm really tired, pretty much sucked that I came into syracuse this morning an hour and a half before I had to be at work. Not the best idea, but I have a 3 day weekend this week sat-mon, so glad.

words of a loving mother,

Thu, 11 Oct 2007 02:22:52 GMT

"fuck you,
fuck your job,
fuck your soul..."

loveyoutoocunt.

so.

Fri, 28 Sep 2007 02:39:56 GMT

i've realized a lot. i pretty much want to start fresh, all the people who used to be in my life that haven't really stuck around. i pretty much want to erase them from my thoughts, i spend a lot of time thinking back on memories that i really wish i wouldn't. i've done my fair share of who knows what and it's different now. people from my past, may it be years ago or even months ago. it's just unnecessary and it's better to just forget about them and ignore that it ever happened, than thinking back and aching about it.

dan and i are getting an apartment. i'm looking into places currently. i'm looking for a new job. maybe 2. i'm looking for something part time at the moment.

i'm in the process of getting a bunch of tattoos started/finished. i got my hands tattooed this past weekend. the webbing of my fingers. it fades quick. next time i get something done i'm having them touched up.

i pretty much want to pick up an leave. i'm sick of waiting around for things to happen. i'm sick of school. it's really not working out. i don't know how people can't understand, it's not for me.

i'm thinking about going to a mortuary school. working in a funeral home. but who knows how much that costs. probably costs more a semester than i'd get paid. but i'm looking into it.

i'm getting frustrated so easily. i'm missing pittsburgh a lot. i want to just be there. i'm sick of new york. i think of all the experience i've had here with locals and i've only met a few people who really have been true friends. friendship, trust, loyalty... is really rare here to people. people like to take advantage or people and twist shit around. i'm sick of it. the few good people i've met... i know i'll keep them around and i know we will continue to be friends. the rest, i doubt they'd care if i went or stayed. and i could careless about them either.

i like how one day i mean the world to someone, the next it's like i'm a disease. or how you can tell someone there's something there, then all the sudden it doesn't matter if i fall of the face of the earth. people never really care, they will lie to you face and tell you they do... but you're just another person. you have no feelings in their eyes. they're the ones who are emotionless. i pitty them. i pitty you.

i am

Sun, 16 Sep 2007 23:34:21 GMT

i am the happiest i've been in awhile. honestly, i don't think it's possible for me and dan to really have a bad moment together. we have never fought through out our relationship. i mean we have some difference, but it has never negatively affected us.
i'm so glad that my best friend is who i call my boyfriend. i couldn't ask for anything better. dan is pretty much the best thing in my life at the moment.

i got my tattoo touched up, getting it filled in saturday night when i get my ribs done. i'm so excited.

i hate that i only see dan on weekends, it really sucks that it works out like that. :/ i wish it was different, but it's not. but i mean, eventually we are all moving out to a house together maybe in auburn. but until then i'll deal with my weekend visits and seeing him makes it so much worth it. it gives me time to realize just how much i miss him. and makes everything just that much more amazing.

Ugh

Fri, 14 Sep 2007 12:20:03 GMT

I keep having really shitty dreams and i'm just sick of it. I wish I could just stop having dreams again if this is all i'm going to have. The worst part about it is, half way through them... i start thinking I've already woken up and i just happen to be whereever the dream takes place even though I know that the said place doesn't look quite like the way i'm dreaming it. :/ So i end up going on with the dream as if it was my real life, then eventually something happens where i'm either crushed or about to die or something and I wake up soon after.

UGH

i hate

Thu, 13 Sep 2007 01:17:47 GMT

i hate everything.
nothings change.
i'm sick of everyone.
we're not friends anymore.
i put trust in no one anymore.
you. yes you. will or have probably fucked me over once or maybe more.
fuck you.

give up.
don't be fake with me.
i mean nothing to any of you.
you all mean nothing to me.

dgdgsdgd

Wed, 12 Sep 2007 03:39:35 GMT

i'm sick.
shit is getting better i guess.
i am going to end up dropping out of occ next semester against my mom's wishes.
i'm probably going to end up working a full and part time job.
i hope it doesnt end up like that though.
i'm going to move to auburn in the next year.

i hate shit

ugh.

Mon, 06 Aug 2007 21:40:15 GMT

i'm in a shitty mood.
i hate everything.
i hate everyone.

12 hours.

Thu, 26 Jul 2007 22:05:09 GMT

i'll be leaving for indiana in 12 hours.

oh man!

Sun, 08 Jul 2007 05:26:23 GMT

Tue, 26 Jun 2007 01:47:58 GMT

there's no telling where you'll be tomorrow
so, just remember where you are today

Thu, 14 Jun 2007 18:08:29 GMT

Mon, 11 Jun 2007 08:20:16 GMT

Elise is my girlfriend.

cheered me up.

Sat, 02 Jun 2007 07:29:47 GMT

:) just nights with new friends can cheer you up.

monster trucks tomorrow.
i better be able to go, or i'll cry.

p.s.

Sat, 02 Jun 2007 02:40:09 GMT

it's fucked up when your BEST FRIEND doesn't answer your calls anymore because they're too busy hanging out with stupid sluts.
:(

this is why i miss the 412 and i hate fucking new york.
friends mean nothing to anyone here apparently.